1. Those floating words above us do not actually exist, they were added post-photograph with the aid of PHOTO MANIPULATION.
2. Similarly, my jacket is actually a rather complex hologram. I can not wear jackets because of an acute phobia.
3. That is not actually Chris (who refuses to ever be photographed), but instead a homunculus made in his likeness, mostly out of clay and dog hair.
4. Neither the homunculus nor I are wearing anything on the lower halves of our bodies. This is usual for the homunculus. I joined him in order to give the photograph more symmetry, and also because I was incredibly drunk at the time.
Have a good evening,
- Sam Decimus
(Sam’s witt, displayed for everyone to see in response to someone who later became a fan’s snide comment.)